Ingrid & Álvaro & Björn

Walking!

2010-01-14T12:46:00.002+01:00

Yesterday Björn let go of the sofa and threw himself out onto the dangerous floor without anything to hold on to!

I didn't count the steps, but he walked as far as 2 meters all by himself. ...and I don't know who was most proud of his accomplishment - him or me (mami). Now he is in the kindergarten, and I am curious of if he is going to try out his new skills there, or if he does not feel just that safe yet.

Yesterday I weighted him, and the poor little thing only weighs around 9 and a half kilo... He was ill around christmas, and I think he lost a substential amount then. And this week he has also been ill; throwing up and not so much interested in eating. Not even the ginger cookies, bananas, or sandwiches with "leverpastej". Maybe he got scared, when his mami started to cook riceporridge with first soy-milk, and then rice-milk... Suddenly his favourite food got such a strange taste? Even if mami tried to cover it up with jam, Björn is a big boy and not that easy to fool! Ha!

Papá has been a few days away on business trip and will return late tonight. I wonder if Björn is going to be able to fall asleep again in case he wakes up in the middle of the night and realises that Papá is back? He is greatly missed!

Long time gone by...

2010-01-05T12:47:00.005+01:00

Sorry that the blog has not been updated for so long.
But really, the only thing that has happened is that Björn has got more teeth... He has now 15! we are waiting for the last one to pop up, and hope that it will take a few months before he gets his 2-year molars.
He has been growing also, ofcorse. And soon, soon, he will walk by himself. Though we actually thought that a few months ago already, and until now he keeps holding on to chairs, boxes and other movable items on his journey around the apartment.

We are happy to announce (in case someone doesnt know it yet) that we are going to Santiago de Chile the second of February! We are staying for a month and returns to the winter in Oslo the third of March.

Now it is already past lunchtime, and Ingrid has to leave the computer in order to do the dishes etc. ...or do I?
Will stay in touch!

Mer om Björncito's sömn...

2009-08-09T11:27:00.003+02:00

Det går numera relativt smärtfritt att "övertala" Björn till att somna.

Lite bakgrund: Björn har egentligen aldrig varit förtjust i att somna. Vi gissar att det beror på att han hellre vill fortsätta att undersöka omgivningarna, och dessutom så sover ju inte hans mamma och pappa!

När han var liten (som motsättning till nu när han är hela tio månader gammal! ;) ) ammade jag honom ofta till sömns. Vilket fungerade för oss alla, ända tills Björn började vakna var och varannan timme på nätterna och kräva ammning för att kunna somna om. Det resulterade i att vi - smått desperata - valde att satsa på 5-minuters metoden. Kontroversiell metod, men vi (särskilt jag) var desperata och visste inte vad vi annars skulle göra. Dessutom fungerade den bra för oss. Efter ett par nätter sov Björn från kvällen till klockan sex på morgonen. Vilket han fortsatt med ända sen dess!

Men om han sover gott när han har somnat, så hade fortfarande en kamp för att få honom att somna. Antingen var han inte tillräckligt trött för att somna än, eller så var han övertrött. Under ett par månader lyckades jag ganska bra med att pricka in när han var precis lagom trött för att somna. Men när han började krypa, och än värre när han började stå upp, så blev det riktigt jobbigt igen. Han är ju trött, men han har så mycket kryp i benen, att de håller honom vaken. ...skulle man kunna säga...

Så hur fick vi Björn att somna under de senaste två-tre veckorna?

Vi planerade faktiskt att använda 5-minuters metoden igen, men eftersom vi skulle till Stockholm ett par dagar, så ville vi vänta tills vi kom hem. I stockholm slängde Álvaro ut mig ur hotellrummet ett par gånger när B behövde sova, och lät honom sen somna hos sig i sängen, samtidigt som de båda tittade på tv.

Jag tror att tv:n fungerade som avledning för Björn så att han inte tänkte på att han höll på att somna. Han kröp omkring lite i sängen fram och tillbaka, klättrade på Álvaro och på väggen.

Enligt Álvaro, så var trollformeln enkel: Stop fighting. Don't make it a fight.

Jag blev lite orolig att Björn nu inte skulle kunna somna om han inte var framför tv:n. Men efter ett par dagar hemma, så kunde vi lägga oss inne på sovrummet och han somnade bredvid oss där.

Det är nu vad vi gör varje gång han ska sova (om vi inte är ute och går). Vi lägger oss i stora föräldra-sängen, låter Björn krypa omkring lite och väntar på att han ska somna mer eller mindre av sig själv där. När han sedan sover, flyttar vi över honom i hans spjälsäng där han får fortsätta sova tills han vaknar.

Det kan för övrigt noteras, att han numera ofta sover lite längre på förmiddagen. Det är numera inte ovanligt att han sover i en timme eller nästan en och en halv, vilket han aldrig gjorde förut.

Visst gråter han fortfarande, visst vill han fortfarande hellre vara vaken, men vi har inte närmare en timme skrikning innan han somnar - antagligen av pur utmattning.

Nu kanske han somnar senare än jag tror att han behöver. Men det betyder att på kvällen somnar han mellan klockan sju och klockan nio, vanligtvis ungefär åtta. På dagarna sover han också på ungefärliga tider. Så de strikta sov-tider som jag trodde var så viktiga fungerar inte riktigt för oss. Men vad gör det när han somnar snällt (relativt), sover så mycket som han behöver, och vaknar oftast vid gott mod.

Sammanfattning:

Vi har börjat samsova med Björn vid insomningen, både på kvällen och på dagtid om vi inte är ute och går. När han somnat lägger vi honom i spjälsängen där han sover till klockan sex på morgonen.

Innan han somnar kryper han runt, klättrar, snackar, klagar och gråter. Om vi ligger i en timme innan han somnar, så gråter han iallafall inte hela den tiden. Eventuellt behöver han något som avleder uppmärksamheten från att han ska sova.

Allt enligt devisen: No fight for sleep.

Vi ger honom också ett natur-medel för att han inte ska oroa sig, och ha mycket ångest, eftersom han är i en omvälvande livs fas. Då refererar jag till separationsångest och allmänt upptäckande att världen är stor, spännande och ibland farlig.

Sleeping!!!

2009-07-11T20:26:00.003+02:00

Lately, the evenings have been awful. Simply awful and terrible!
Björn has cried - not wanting to fall asleep even though he gave all signs on being tired. I have felt bad about leaving him standing up in the crib, crying, and I have felt bad about taking him up - he is a baby and needs his sleep.

I have read that 9-months babies usually sleep around 13-15 hours per day, and that they ought to get at least 12. But lately B has slept only 9 during the night. Even though he has more or less kept the pattern of sleeping two times during daytime - around half an hour both times.... And that does not add up to 12 hours!

Unfortunately, me and Á does not agree on the best approach. I have put B in his bed, tried to read, sing, comfort and calm him down. After a while of intense crying and no sign of falling asleep or even being too tired to stand up, Á has taken him up and into the livingroom to play and watch telly with us...
Then one to two hours later - usually around 21 - he has again been tired and this time almost immediately fallen asleep.
But as he wakes up at 6 every morning, and as I need my eight hours of beauty sleep, there has been no time for neither being a couple, nor being just me.

So what have I done?
The other day, we headed to the library. Where we, by the way, got "the evil eye" when B was laughing and chatting to some posters with animals. True, before that he was crying cause his stupid mom thought - as usual - that he was tired, but that was long forgotten.

So, I borrowed two books about raising babies. One with articles by Jesper Juul - a danish "baby-guru", and the swedish such: Anna Wahlgren. Wahlgren is quite controversal in Sweden while she suggests some methods that, wrongly used?, may be harmful for the baby. She has also something called a Standardmodel, which is criticised because all children do not fit in the same model, but I have not yet read about it. I only just started, am not planning to implement everything these gurus are promoting, but was just desperate for some advise concerning sleep...

So Wahlgren talked about giving the baby some solitude in the mornings when they play and investigate things calmly still lying in their own beds. She suggested to give them a few toys that they might be interested in, and to exchange them occasionally.
This made me remember when B was younger, and we gave him some toys in the evening for him to fall asleep with. The reason was the same as now: he was full of energy, but at the same time tired, and he could play as long as he wanted, and then fall asleep. And we thought that the play in the crib would be calmer than if he was up with us.
It worked then, so why not now?

So today I decided to put him in the bedroom at seven, and I read to him, sang to him when he cried the most, and comforted him when he got tired of standing up. He had a plastic duck that he loves but only has played with in the bath -> not too familiar object, and ofcorse the teddybear which he always has in his bed.
And somehow he did calm down and fall asleep after only 30 minutes!

Now, I am going to follow another advice from "the ones who knows": I will make better rutines than what I have, and I will stick to them! This includes putting B in bed at seven, and let him fall asleep by himself with the help of a few toys he can chew on (and ofcorse investigate, if that is what he does, I suspect he just chews on them..).

Wish me luck for the future. ;)
Now I will relax with dark choclate and punsch.
Big kiss from me to you!

short...

2009-07-01T14:56:00.002+02:00

oops, it was some time ago since I wrote the last time... though I did intend to write more often, but ... well, apparently didnt happen.

Now I sit in Alvaros office with B in my lap.. apparently he has finished investigating the office and want to be the center of attention again.
It is very warm outside, so myself, I prefer to stay inside, but maybe I should take B and go... out? city-center? open barnehage? - no, they are already closed... I always miss their opening-hours :(

dont know what to do, but I will see if I can remember to write again soon.
Ciao!

Being a mami...

2009-03-15T12:48:00.000+01:00

So, just to complete the blog, I will write about what has happened during the last 5+ months that has passed since the last post.

Birth

2009-03-15T11:49:00.000+01:00

As I think everyone knows by now, Álvaro and I went to the hospital the night after the last post was written. The contractions just got stronger during the day, and around 1 am we decided that we were not comfortable to be at home anymore.

We called for a taxi, and when we stepped into the hospital entrance, I thought that the water broke. Luckily it was not in the taxi! ...and it was not the water, just some other blood and stuff that came from somewhere (I never got any explanation on what actually was going on, but it was apparently nothing abnormal).
We were shown into a delivery-room, and got ourselves comfortable while waiting for the mid-wife. When she came, she was checking if it was the water that had broken, and how far gone I was. ...unfortunately she had bad news: I was only one cm dilated, so this would take some time... Apparently they assume that one opens one cm per hour, and the dilation has to be 10 cm.
So we had 10 hours to look forward to... but who knows? Maybe it would go faster?
Time passed by... I had contractions every five minutes, I threw up everything I tried to eat or drink, and I did not dilate. We tried the warm bath, but it was not at all as comfortable as I had expected. Acupuncture helped me dilate a few cm, and the midwife explained that I have to relax for the dilation to work. Yeah, right.

At some point in the afternoon Álvaro took me to the supermarket (it's in the hospital-area, so he thought they should be used to more or less sick/pregnant people coming in). I still had contractions every five minute and was very happy that Álvaro was stable and could hold me up. Outside the shop I threw up again, and felt really embarrased.
Around 8 pm, our midwife in the natural-birth-clinic suggested that we should start to consider to go over to the traditional birth-clinic (which was downstairs and across the hall - very close!). We agreed, and waiting for things to be ready, we danced a bit of salsa - on the encouragement of our midwife, and with her laughter accompanying the music. At this time I think I was 7 cm dilated.

At 10 pm, we went over to the other side of the birth-clinics, in order to get Oxytocin (to speed up the dilation-process) and epidural to kill the pain. The reason why I originally didn't want to have epidural, was that I thought it would make me totally numb from waist down. I thought I would not feel the contractions anymore and not be able to feel when and how to push. I was very happily suprised when I was told that nowadays, they give the epidural with a pump so that they can easily regulate the amount. I only got a small amount, and it killed the pain, but did not make me numb at all! I could go to the toilet, and the midwife and the doctor marvelled at the ease I had jumping up and down the bed.
At this point I had not been eating anything for a very long time, so we had a bit of a break before they put in the hormone. We had two sandwiches and hot choclate, and it tasted better than ever!

After the half-an-hour break, they started the oxytocin-pump and after that everything went (relatively) very fast.
In the beginning of the pushing-phase, it felt as if I needed to poo. If the feeling changed later, I can't tell... I just know that it was not so complicated as I had feared. The body does what is has to do, and tells the brain what it has to do. It was painful. Ofcorse. But when I got a small tear, it was so painful that I was convinced that 1) they had made a cut without telling me, and 2) I would not be able to push the baby out. I am not a person that usually is loud, I don't cry and scream a lot. But at this point I screamed and cried for them to pull the baby out, cause I couldn't.

After what felt like hours, the baby finally plopped out at 1.15 am Friday the 3rd of October.
And then I got a schock... Björncito was all blue, did only move his eyes a bit, and cried so silently that I didnt hear a thing. Though Álvaro did hear him. Álvaro also says that he was not all limp, but the midwifes still took him out of the room almost immediately. And he didnt get back until almost fifteen minutes later... Oh, that was horrible minutes!
Sure, we were told that everything was all right and that our baby was ok, but he wasn't with us...
I had nightmares about my blue baby for two weeks afterwards. I tried to talk to the people at the hospital about it, but there where noone who felt responsible for talking to me about the trauma I had had. The baby was fine, it was just that the picture of a blue, non-moving and quiet baby had burned itself into my mind.
Everything is normal. A blue baby is normal. Not moving for the first 2 minutes is normal. Not crying loud is normal. Etc...

Naja. By now I have long recovered from the "fear of the blue baby". And I am so happy to have him!

still pregnant...

2008-10-01T10:41:00.003+02:00

This morning we went to visit the midwife again. Happily we brought our hospital-bags, while I had had contractions - painful such - the whole night and hardly been able to sleep.... And what does she tell us? - That the contractions are not strong enough and that our baby might arrive later today, tomorrow, or perhaps next week? She even gave us a new appointment for next week!

...so we went home again... and now I am so disappointed.... but perhaps I am in a bad mood also because I have not slept well. It is two days until the expected B-day, and I so wish that he will not wait until then. or at least - that the contractions are not going to be constantly chasing me for another two days!

apart from this, everything is fine and life goes on as usual.
Now I will try to sleep a bit, and in the afternoon I might even go for a walk - it is supposed to be healthy and promote further progress in the birth-process. ..and if I buy some chocolate on the way... well, that would promote the production of the contraction-hormones... ;)

Week 37...

2008-09-12T11:23:00.001+02:00

This picture is taken one week ago, in week 36... Now I have only three weeks left until the B(aby)-date and we are actually expecting Björncito to arrive any day. He has his head fixed, and the belly has sunk - so he is ready...

Unfortunately we are not quite as ready ourselves. Our pram (Carena, green) has not arrived, and the bed from IKEA which we have had our eyes on is not sold in Norway. Mind you, it exists in the catalogue and on the internet, but we would have to order it from Sweden which would make it 1.5 times more expensive!
But at least we have the most important stuff. Clothes (in excess, probably), sheep-fur (which is essential according to all norwegian baby-sites, and which we got from Álvaro's mom), diapers and toys...
I get amazed when I look at the picture. I really look like an expectant, soon-to-be mom.

I am still very healthy and in good shape. I am ofcorse more tired now than usual, and feel rather heavy when I am out walking, but I have also gained weight lately, and the baby ought to be around 3 kilos by now so the centre of gravity has naturally shifted.
I am happy that the time is coming to an end, also because most clothes do not fit anymore... I have a bunch which I was sure I would be able to have until the end, but even those are just too small. Either they don't fit at all, or they just look very strange...
I am happy that I got talked into buying at least some maternity clothes some time ago! And a big thanks to my sister who went with me!

I don't have any more news, I think. Álvaro has got a letter with acceptance of his thesis and panel, so now he can buy the ticket and start planning for the defense. Me and Björncito can probably not go, which makes me sad... why does it have to take such a long time to get a personal number???

Finally I have put up photos on Picasa from Santiago de Chile, and some other pictures too. Have a look! (see link to the right)

Whale...

2008-06-20T12:45:00.002+02:00

I think it is for the best to point out who is writing this post. It is Ingrid. She also wants to point out that she is in parts trying to be ironic, and she doesn't mean any harm to either humans or non-humans.

"To eat or not to eat..." - that has been my dilemma during the last week. Álvaro was invited by his boss to a grilling-whale-party, together with all collegues and their families.
Someone offered me an easy solution in that I blame it on my pregnancy that I dont dare to eat "such strange food", or if it was because it is on the top of the food-chain? Anyway, it felt like a bad excuse. Either I would a nice wife who is interested in trying new things (including eating endangered species, "trusting" the norweigans that this particular kind of whale is not endangered at all), or I would be the swedish bitch who destroyes the party with her ideas regarding hunting and eating whales...
Well, good or bad, I chose the first option.

And now I can tell you that they (the norweigans) seem to also not regard cod (SE: torsk) as being endangered. I can also tell everyone who ever wondered, that whale tastes like liver. And looks like liver.

I chose not to say a word about my opinion about what we were eating. But next year I will certainly pass on the whale and hope that the indian family is joining us with some nice extra food.

That's it, I ate whale... I broke my principles, but I still want to promote actions against whale-hunting!!!! It is an endangered species and it is not right that the humanity kills the world just for own egoistic pleasure!

Greetings from Oslo

2008-06-19T15:26:00.002+02:00

At first, I have to send my special regards to two girls who have recently submitted their PhD-thesis! Way to go! Hurray!

On a “safe” distance from the MPI in Hamburg, I can tell you that I am a bit envious... some days I wonder if I did take the right decision and if it wouldn't have been possible for me to finish – when it all comes down to it? But then I remember how I felt, and even though I do feel a small envy of those managing it, I have to admit that I simply didn't have what it took.
So I want to send an eloge to those who do make it, and tell them how very impressed I am about their abilities!!!
Big kiss to the two of you!!!

Secondly I have to thank (again) our friends who have come to visit us in Oslo during the short time we have been here! It was wonderful to have all of you here! ...to celebrate new year, to visit museums, or just to hang out!
You are most welcome back! And for all of you who still have not seen (the norweigan version of) Casa Engvaldebenito – You are more than welcome to come! The only restriction is not to come in October this year :)

...and I guess you all already know why!
The B-day is expected to be the 3rd of October...

Which brings me to the next post in this blogg....

Pregnant in the seventh month...

2008-06-19T14:45:00.004+02:00

Six months have now passed, during which I have been pregnant and preparing for becoming a mother. No, I can't say that I am prepared yet! Luckily I still have three months left...
...and to see that black-on-white makes me wanna run away and hide, or ask whoever in charge that this is a mistake and we have to cancel and start all over again!

Is there anyone out there who seriously can see me as a responsible mother, with the capacity of bringing up a child? I myself, have loads of arguments against this. For example, someone has told me that I seem to be a person who is not finishing started projects. This might be a fair observation - especially considering the PhD-project which, as we all know, went down the drain. I hate cleaning the house, I love to eat breakfast in peace and quiet for hours, and I love to substitute dinner for choclate and/or ice-cream...
All these things have to change. I have to get used to the idea of loving a child who screams without (seemingly) any reason, and who kills my ears. Babies are further smelly, always hungry and totally dependent on their parents.

Could someone tell me why I have got myself into this?
With open eyes I got married to Álvaro. Knowing that at some point we would have children - either our own or adopted. Several times during my life I have thought about the possibility of having children, I have weighted good versus bad, and often come to the conclusion that I better not do that. But lately maybe my biological clock started ticking, and I have thought that it might be quite nice. And there couldn't be any better husband and father than Álvaro (especially considering that he is already "baby-trained" from early age.. ;) ).

Anyway. Fact is that in approximately three months there will be a small baby added to my family. He is kicking in my belly and if he would be aware of what will happen, he would probably wonder what kind of parents he will get. I hope he will be happy with us.
The other day we watched a movie, and when they played rap-music he started kicking a lot! Other days I think we will have a small kung-fu master in the house, but I also think all future mum's think that their baby is kicking particularly hard and a lot...
We have decided on the question of pram. We will buy one that is green and that can be found on www.carenababy.com. It's called Free.

I got a wish (a couple of months ago) that I would feel sick, and I think this is the only time in my life that I appreciated such a greeting! :)
I did. But not too bad, and when I changed my diet I felt immediately much better. On the other hand, I was extremely sleepy during that second month.
I sometimes freak out about eating too much sweets, too much bread, and too little vegetables. On the other hand, I have been assured that the baby will "take" whatever he needs, and if someone is suffering, it is me. Which I can live with. After all, if I am not eating properly it is my fault, not the poor baby's! And actually I feel very healthy, and every time I go to the doctor (although it was some time ago now) I have been in perfect shape. And at the ultrasound a month ago, the baby was kicking and turning almost the whole time, just pausing enough to drink a bit, and to let the doctor check length, heart etc...

Both me and Álvaro are very happy and really looking forward to be three!
We are planning things for the future, such as which books to read, which sports to introduce to Björn first, and which kindergarten we would prefer to get him into.
I went to meet other soon-to-be-mum's, and talked to one girl about what they had started to buy for their child. She thought that buying children books was a bit too early. She had bought some clothes and teddy-bears... We will buy the pram in September, and probably go to IKEA and buy a bed and some soft animals at the same time.

There are still a lot of things we have to buy for the baby, and arrange, and paper to fill in. Most of that will have to wait, though, until we are back from Chile.
Finally we are going! In the beginning of July goes the flight and we will be back on the northern hemisphere almost a month later.
We are both so much looking forward! And I promise I will update this blogg when we are back home again!

Don't forget to have a look at our photos! They can be found in the list links to the right.
I have started to use JAlbum to display our photos, and I think this link is better to use than Picasa.
Entonces: hasta luego! Vi ses!

not-so-new-anymore news

2008-03-23T12:26:00.015+01:00

Our old TV from Hamburg died last night. As I (Álvaro) don't have it anymore to distract me from the things I should be doing, I decided to post some of our not-so-new-anymore news.

Things are much better and we are settled in our not-so-new-anymore apartment.
Last month, in company of the Sennans (add the Simpsons intro music when read) went to IKEA and bought a good deal of furniture, including the much advertised red bed-sofa so we can have visitors.

IKEA Norway charges from 80€ to deliver "inside doors", so we used the opportunity to buy 4 bookshelves and a desk. We spent much of that weekend assembling the furniture, or IKE-ing for connoisseurs. It took us weeks to get rid of all the packaging,, but we managed to get everything ready for our first set of guests of 2008.

Linda and Mattias came last weekend and force us to show our not-so-new-anymore city. We had a great time, the weather was perfect to walk trough the city, and that is what we did. We suck as tourist guides, but we are improving. For example, now we know that the tourist information office is closed on Saturdays.

April will be calm month. I will spend 10 days, including my birthday, in UK for a course at ECMWF. Ingrid has a job interview one day before her birthday. We have 3 visitors scheduled for May. First Dorothea, and later Sabrinchen and Tobigochi. We are waiting for confirmation of Melissa and Ole for August, and Francesca anytime.

If you find this post boring, blame it on my thesis. After reading, writing and correcting the text over and over, I feel that I can not write in a fun way anymore.

Under another bridge

2008-01-03T22:22:00.001+01:00

After a really long time without posting, here we are again. Loads of things have happened since. Ingrid and I got the papers on time and got married in the civil registry and the church as we originally planed on autumn 2006.

One year later Ingrid quitted her PhD and we started planning our relocation to Oslo where I got a job from beginning 2008. We had previously planned that I would finish my PhD thesis before November 2007 and then leave for one month holiday in Chile. Unfortunately fate decided otherwise, the day before out plane we got bad news about Ingrid's mom health (Birgitta). We canceled our flight and took a train to Halmstad instead. Birgitta passed away later that week.

Now I struggle to find peace of mind to finish my writing, my new work starts tomorrow, and I'm scarred to look ahead into our the future. I wander when the tide will change and if there is enough of me to swim ashore.

Tomorrow, Ingrid will come back home from Halmstad and I hope to see land again. In the meantime, I'll try to think about what I have and not what I'm missing.

The weight of time

2006-08-07T20:31:00.000+02:00

The wheels of bureaucracy grind slowly, especially when you don't belong to the EU and you want to marry one of their citizens... Let me enlighten you with our experience of how to get married in Hamburg (rules may change from Bundesland to Bundesland).

First, you need to go to a special office in the Bezirksamt called Standesamt, once there and according to the nationalities involved, you will be told which papers each one of the wedded-wanna-be-couple should provide, each one of them to be presented in "Original Form", accompanied by an "Official Translation to German" and an "Official Certificate of the Validity of the Official Translation".

Besides the expected papers (passport, birth certificate and Meldebestätigung) there is a tricky one called Ehefähigkeitszeugnis, which is simply a "certificate of no impediment to get married" (i.e. that you're old enough, single, and genetically unrelated to the second degree from your husband/wife-to-be).

Due to of the non-existence of such a thing in Chile (and probably in any country outside of EU), a proxy is needed, in this case a statement from the parents saying "we are the parents of our child and (as far as we know) he/she/it is single", this should be properly stated in front of a Notary, then handled in to the Foreign Affairs Ministry for Official Translation and finally Official Stamped by the German Consulate.

After all the papers are gathered (in original form and official translations and official certificates of the validity of the official translations), another trip to the Standesamt is in need. This is the appointment to get the appointment to get married. There you will be informed about the consequences of lying on your Anmeldung der Eheschließung (3 years in prison), and after paying a certain amount money you will be officially engaged.

Now comes the catch, the usual Ehefähigkeitszeugnis has an expiration date, this is 4 months after being issued in the Swedish case. Meanwhile the Ehefähigkeitszeugnis proxy (statement from the parents...) needs to be sent to the Oberlandesgericht, together with all the other papers including the Swedish Ehefähigkeitszeugnis. There the dossier, by now 5cm thick, will collect dust between 2 to 3 months or until it has aged enough to be taken into consideration.

In our case we were lucky to have cooperative families who pushed for us the wheels of bureaucracy in our countries (and we were smart enough to use express mail delivery service), so the collection of all the required papers took only 1 month, giving us just 3 months before the Swedish Ehefähigkeitszeugnis expires.

And the only thing we can do, is to sit on our asses and wait for the post-mail with the final decision of the Oberlandesgericht, and then run to the Standesamt and get an appointment to get married, hopefully before the expiration date of our papers.
And then you wonder why people go to Las Vegas or Copenhagen to get married...

So, if you are intending to do the unthinkable
(marry in an officially-translated-officially-stamped-loving country)
maybe you should consider the alternatives:

retire to a life of solicitude & celibacy
live a life in sin
go for a weeding trip to Copenhagen
take some extra strong pills of patience

Gifts

2006-08-06T14:15:00.000+02:00

After careful consideration and going through all wedding-magazines, shop-catalogues, kitchen-cupboards (to see what we need), we have taken the difficult decision about what to ask our close-ones to give us as wedding-gift. According to magazines and websites, this is one of the biggest and most important tasks for a wedding-couple to make.
We seriously considered to make a list in one of these shops: Swarovski, Amazon, Espirit, Rosenthal, Villeroy&Boch and IKEA.
However, one morning I dropped my juice-glass in our bed, and imagine my surprise when I realise that I have to – not only dry up the juice, but also pick up the pieces of the broken glass! So, then and there, we decided to ask for a contribution to a new bed.

For the ones who still have a few coins at the time when they arrive to our party, there will be a piggy-bank standing in a corner. But we want to remind everyone, that no one should feel obliged to give us anything more than the pleasure of his or her company!

Wedding dress shopping

2006-08-06T13:15:00.000+02:00

Wedding dress shopping is an adventure.
The first dresses you try on, and you look at yourself in the mirror and realise – maybe it is the first time that it really hits you – you are going to be a bride! Marry "the love of your life"!

Yesterday you were a confused single with a messed-up love life who always picked the wrong guys, and tomorrow you will be Mrs and Señora.
And of cause you can’t avoid a small hesitation. Is your husband-to-be really Mr Right? Can you stand his flaws for the rest of your life? Will he always be as wonderful as he is right in this amazing moment?

These were the big thoughts that popped up in the bridal-shops changing rooms. And then there were the smaller ones:
What is this fuss about a veil? I don’t want to have one; I am proud of my hair and convinced that it is totally out of fashion to put a veil as “the dot over the i”. But mind you; don’t dare to tell the bridal-dress-sellers this! You are only bride once, and brides have veils – basta!
Brides also have trains on their dresses. With small, practical hooks to hang it on after the church-ceremony if you would happen to be concerned about tripping over or stepping on it so you break your dress.
Surely there is no bride in the world that has not always dreamed of having a bridal dress with a wide skirt and three layers of petticoats! The suggestion of having a narrow skirt for a church-ceremony puts horror on the faces of the saleswomen, and once I dared to ask about the price on a dress with a skirt only reaching to the knees... And yet, the same woman forced me to try a dress with a neckholder, even though I made an effort of being very clear about that I do not like that style.

In the beginning I was looking for a dress that was not white. It took me a long time to realise that non-white dresses are for civil weddings, not for church-ceremonies. It took me slightly shorter time to realise that the wedding dress standard fashion is snow-white, whipped cream, kind of thing with a long train and a veil on top.
But if I would wear such a thing, where goes my personality? It wouldn’t even fit inside of the very cute, tiny purse that comes with the dress. This said, but in no way whatsoever implying that I consider myself to have a large ego, I just happen to have one that doesn't feel comfortable wrapped up as a white, silky, praline.

Hotels

2006-05-24T16:29:00.000+02:00

Because our own logging capacity is rather limited, we have compiled a list of hotels, hostels and bed&breakfast agencies in Hamburg . If you don’t find the list fulfilling, you can find more information on the web (e.g.: www.hamburg-travel.de, www.hotel.de, www.bootsnall.com/hostels)
There will also be a limited possibility of staying with our friends as a cheaper option, just let us know if you prefer this option.

Time & Place

2006-05-24T16:00:00.000+02:00

The 14th of October 2006, at three o'clock, in the St.Trinitatis (Hauptkirche Altona), Hamburg.

Ingrid & Álvaro

2006-05-14T16:02:00.000+02:00

Hi dear friends and family!
This is our blog, to keep you posted for our upcoming wedding.